Red: The Adventure Begins Read online

  The entire assembly wondered what Red had whispered to her father.

  But she’d never tell. And neither would he.

  She told him, “Don’t worry, Daddy. There’s room in my heart for both of you.”

  When Butch drove the couple to the airport in Austin to fly to Waikiki for their honeymoon, he asked them, “Did you open up my wedding gift?”

  “No, Dad. You told us not to, until we came back.”

  “I know. But you haven’t always done everything I asked you to do.”

  “I did when it was important. And I knew this was important to you.”

  “How did you know that?”

  “I could tell by looking into your eyes when you handed it to us.”

  Russell chuckled.

  “I still think it’s just an empty box. I think you just needed more time to decide what to get us, so you gave us an empty box with an IOU inside.”

  Butch smiled.

  He’d liked Russell immediately, the day Red brought him home with her the year before.

  Russell shared the same weird sense of humor Red inherited from Butch.

  “Yep. I’m busted. You found me out. I couldn’t decide between getting you guys a weed eater or a set of hub caps for your wedding, so I decided to give you an empty box instead. I plead guilty, your honor.”

  Red knew better. She knew there was something special in the box, and she was dying to know what it was.

  She’d honor his request, though, and wait until they returned from Hawaii before she opened it. And she’d open it in his presence.

  So he could explain what it was and what it meant.

  Red pretended to whine.

  “But Dadddddd… You sure know how to drive a girl crazy. You know that the whole time we’re in Waikiki I’ll be doing nothing else but wondering what’s in that box.”

  Russell said in a conspiratorial tone, “Wrong, baby. You and I will find some other nice things to do on our honeymoon.”

  Red blushed, which didn’t happen very often, and Butch feigned anger.

  “Hey, you watch it, buddy. That’s my little girl you’re talking about.”

  Then he looked Red in the eyes and said, “But, actually, I guess you’re not so little anymore, are you, honey?”

  Red’s eyes moistened and she answered, “No, Daddy. Not anymore.”

  Red had been a wonderful child.

  Now she was an incredible woman.

  Chapter 7

  Red had forgotten that fair skinned beauties burned easily in the tropical sun.

  Russell had tried to warn her.

  “Now honey, you should limit yourself to the late afternoon sunlight, and only for an hour or so a day.”

  Red was touched.

  “Aww, thank you, honey, for watching out for me.”

  “Hey, if you get burned, I won’t be able to make love to you more than six, seven times a day, tops.”

  “Yeah. Like I said. Thank you so much for watching out for me.”

  “No problem. Glad I could help.”

  “And by the way, baby, that six or seven times a day stuff…”

  “Yes?”

  “Quit dreaming.”

  Red took Russell’s advice and tried to ease her way into a tan a little at a time.

  But with two days left on their honeymoon, she was still pale and was running out of time.

  And coming back from two glorious weeks at Waikiki Beach without a tan just wasn’t an option.

  So she decided to change her tanning schedule just a bit.

  Worn out from a long evening out the night before, Russell decided to take a nap at two in the afternoon.

  Red snuck down to the soft sand beach just outside the hotel’s back door and spread out a towel.

  She only planned to be out in the hot sun for half an hour or so.

  But then she fell asleep too.

  Russell woke up after an hour or so, but wasn’t concerned. Red had said something that morning about wanting to try out the hotel’s spa before they left.

  He assumed that was where she went, and dozed off again.

  By the time Red finally awoke, she’d slept over two hours in the blazing sun.

  And she felt a bit overbaked.

  When Red stumbled back into their hotel room, Russell took one look at her and didn’t know whether to laugh or to cry.

  Her skin was roughly the same shade of red as her hair.

  “You make any lobster jokes and you’re dead meat.”

  “Oh, baby, I’d never do such a thing. At least not before I find out whether or not you can run.”

  But before he could poke fun at her, he had to make sure his blushing bride of just a few days was okay.

  “Does it hurt?”

  “No, it’s not that bad.”

  And it wouldn’t be.

  Not until the next morning, when Red tried to get out of bed.

  And screamed out in pain.

  Red spent the last day of their honeymoon sitting in a tub full of cool water, sipping one margarita after another.

  The water and the margaritas, working together, did a fairly good job of deadening the pain.

  Russell had other plans for their last day in Hawaii, though.

  “You know, baby, we talked about going out late at night and walking down the beach until we found a secluded spot so we could make love under the stars.”

  “Back off, buddy.”

  “No, seriously, baby. We talked about that, did we not?”

  “Well, duh… things have changed just a bit, lover boy.”

  “Oh, I don’t know, honey. If I’m careful, maybe we can make love without hurting you.”

  “If you’re careful, maybe you’ll wake up in the morning with all your body parts still attached.”

  “Oh, come on, baby. It’ll be fun. And it’ll be our last chance. We may never have another chance to come to Hawaii. And we’ll certainly never have another honeymoon.”

  “You won’t. I might, if you catch my drift.”

  Russell swallowed hard.

  Perhaps he’d gone too far.

  “I have a better idea, honey. Why don’t we just stay in tonight, and I’ll pamper you by bringing you more margaritas and rubbing lotion on your body?”

  “Great idea. I knew you were brilliant. That’s why I married you…”

  Chapter 8

  “I’d hug you, Dad, but I got a little bit burned.”

  “I see that. That Hawaiian sun can be wicked. Does it hurt much?”

  “On a scale of one to ten, there aren’t enough numbers in the world to describe it.”

  “I’m sorry, honey.”

  “Oh, it’s not your fault. It’s his.”

  She pointed her thumb at Russell, who was just out of earshot and getting their suitcases off the baggage carousel.

  “Why? Did he push you out to the beach and lock your hotel room door so you couldn’t get back in?”

  “No. But he should have foreseen that I was going to sneak out to the beach and then fall asleep, and he should have stopped me.”

  “Honey, that is so illogical on so many levels.”

  “I don’t believe in logic, Dad. You know that. Logic and reason and common sense are evil things that I never delve into. They are the devil’s playthings.”

  “Honey…”

  “Dad, when I was young you promised to defend me to my dying breath. If you really love me you’ll go over to Russell and punch him out.”

  Butch thought for a minute. Then he said, “Well, I do love you…”

  Red watched as her father walked over to the baggage carousel and said something to her new husband.

  But she didn’t hear him ask Russell, “If I swing at you, can you take a dive and pretend I punched you out?”

  “But why on earth…”

  “Just answer, yes or no.”

  “Sure. But…”

  Butch took a roundhouse punch and grazed Russell’s chin, just enough to sting a bit but
not to do any real damage.

  Then several things happened all at once. Russell flew through the air in an attempt to win an Academy Award.

  Or at least to impress his new father-in-law.

  Red came running over, placing both hands on Butch’s chest to keep him from any further attacks on Russell.

  Russell made his head flop to the side, and allowed a long line of drool to flow from it and onto the floor. Apparently that was his vision of how someone looked after they’d been knocked out.

  And someone called airport security.

  “Oh, Daddy, I didn’t mean it!”

  “But honey, you told me to do it.”

  Red went racing to Russell’s side and felt for a pulse.

  She asked Butch, “Do you think he’s dead?”

  “Oh, I hope not. It was hard enough finding one guy who’d marry you. I don’t want to have to find another.”

  “Daddy, that’s mean.”

  “That’s mean? Honey, you’re the one who told me to punch him because you got a sunburn.”

  The security guards stood back, sure that at least one of them was stark raving mad but not sure which one it was.

  Then Russell opened one eye to watch the fun.

  He closed it as soon as Red looked toward his face, but it was too late.

  She suspected then that she’d been had.

  Unconscious men normally didn’t open one eye, look around, and then clamp it shut again.

  “Russell, you butthead…”

  Russell sat up and said, “Hey, don’t look at me. He’s the one who told me to take a dive. And he didn’t even tell me why.”

  “Oh, great. We’re going to have some marriage if you’re going to do everything my father tells you to do.”

  Russell looked at the security guards and said, “It’s okay, fellas. It was all an act. I’m okay.”

  The head security guard, who was shaped a bit like Humpty Dumpty and sounded like Elmer Fudd, asked, “Do you people have your luggage?”

  Russell looked at the two suitcases sprawled at his feet and answered, “Yes, sir.”

  “Then please leave the airport.”

  It wasn’t until the three got to the car and drove out of the short-term parking gate that they finally allowed themselves to burst out laughing.

  Red asked, “Dad, would you stop by the store on the way back home?”

  “Sure, honey. What do you need?”

  “I need another big bottle of aloe vera lotion. I already used up the other three.

  “Oh, and a gallon of Blue Bell ice cream. Mint chocolate chip.”

  Russell just looked at her.

  She explained, “Ever since I was a little girl, Dad always bought me a gallon of ice cream whenever I wasn’t feeling well. Mint chocolate chip is my favorite.”

  “But I don’t like mint chocolate chip.”

  “That doesn’t matter. It’s all for me anyway. That was always the rule. Dad bought me ice cream, and I could eat as much as I wanted whenever I wanted. And nobody else could have any. And guess what? It was the best cure-all. Within a couple of days I was all better.”

  Russell looked at Butch, who just shrugged. Then he whispered, “It was her mom’s idea.”

  Red said, “It doesn’t matter whose idea it was. Dad always went out to buy it. And no matter who thought of it, it was a great idea. You’ll never convince me that medicine or time healed me when I was sick. It was the ice cream, and I’ll believe that to my dying day.”

  Russell thought for a moment, then started to say something.

  Butch headed him off at the pass.

  “Hey, hey… just drop it. You’ll never win. Trust me.”

  Russell held his tongue and Red smiled. She’d gotten her way again.

  This marriage thing wasn’t going to be so bad after all.

  Chapter 9

  As they pulled into the circular drive at the ranch house Red had grown up in Russell remarked, “As soon as you’re able, honey, we need to start searching for apartments.”

  “That shouldn’t take long. Blanco’s only got two complexes in the whole city limits.”

  “Yeah, and they’re both dives. I was thinking about the west side of Austin. We’ll have to commute to and from Blanco to see your dad on the weekends, but at least it’ll be close to UT.”

  Russell was pre-law at the University of Texas in Austin.

  “Yeah, I know. I wish we could just lasso Blanco and drag it closer to Austin. I doubt if any of the eighty nine residents would mind much.”

  Butch interrupted.

  “I think I have a better idea than a cramped apartment.”

  They both looked at him.

  “Y’all take your stuff upstairs and then meet me in the den. It’s time to open your wedding gift.”

  Chapter 10

  “Dad, what is all this?”

  Red had just opened the mysterious box containing the wedding gift from Butch.

  The box was wrapped in silver paper with a white ribbon and bow, and tagged with the instructions, “Do not open until after the honeymoon.”

  It weighed almost nothing, and Red was convinced it contained nothing but air.

  And she was almost right. It did contain an awful lot of air.

  But it also contained several sheets of paper, held together with a paperclip.

  She looked through the papers, Russell looking over her shoulder. And as she perused them, she read aloud an occasional word or two.

  “Deed… promissory note… right of way… county tax assessor’s report… surveyor’s report.”

  She looked at Butch and asked, “Dad, this looks like you’re giving us the ranch. We can’t accept that.”

  He corrected her.

  “Not all of it, honey. Just half. When you were a small child and your mother was first diagnosed with leukemia, I took an early retirement from Delta and resigned my commission with the Air National Guard. I hung up my wings so I could spend more time with your mom. I only wish there’d been more of it.”

  He sat down beside her and took her hand before continuing.

  “Your mother and I had some very frank discussions in the days and weeks that followed. We knew even then that her time on earth was limited. By the time they caught up with the cancer the doctors held out little hope for her. It had already done too much damage. And when doctors say there’s no hope, that’s pretty much it. Because they are usually the ones lying to the patient about being able to beat it.

  “Oh, we prayed to God to save her, but even Rita was at peace. Her thinking was that life is just a temporary measure, and she’d see us again someday. She said if God wanted her, then who was she to argue with Him?

  “For a time I told her no, she couldn’t just give up. That she had to live for you, and for me, as well.

  “But finally I accepted the inevitable. And she was way stronger than I was. She was actually the one comforting me, when it should have been the other way around.

  “Anyway, as I said, we had some frank discussions. We wanted to retire in Blanco, because both of us were raised in small towns and wanted that for you too. We chose Blanco because it was close enough to Austin to afford all the amenities like shopping and restaurants and entertainment.

  “Yet it was far enough away from Austin to feel ‘country.’

  “We had enough from my stock sales and our life savings to buy the ranch outright, and mortgage the hardware store. Or, we could have gone the other way and bought the hardware store outright and mortgaged the ranch.

  "We chose to buy the ranch. Our thinking was this… if we couldn’t make enough profit at the store to make the mortgage payments and make a living, we could always declare bankruptcy and the most we’d lose would be the store. I could always get a job in Austin.

  “But if we mortgaged the ranch and fell on hard times, we’d lose our home.

  “And that just wasn’t acceptable.

  “So we paid cash for this place and bought the store thro
ugh the bank.

  “But your mother had a terrific idea. We knew, obviously, that we’d have no more children. So everything we left behind would go to you eventually.

  “Your mom said, ‘But Debbie shouldn’t have to wait until we’re both gone to enjoy the fruits of our labor.’

  “And I agreed. So when we purchased the land, we had it split right down the middle and purchased it as two separate properties.”

  Red was glassy eyed by this time and Butch’s words sounded like “yada yada yada.”

  Butch noticed, and cut to the chase.

  “The western half of the ranch, about forty one acres, now belongs to you.”

  Red’s head was spinning.

  “Wait… what?”

  “I’ve already bought some fence posts and barbed wire so we can officially divide the two properties. The deed lists you and Russell as official owners of the western half. That starts just past the stock pen and includes the hay barn, as well as the west pasture.”

  “Dad… I don’t know what to say. Are you sure about this?”

  “Yes. I also took the liberty of talking to John Savage at the First Bank of Blanco.”

  Red interrupted with a smirk, “You mean the only bank of Blanco.”

  “Yes. I’ve always thought that name was kind of silly myself. Anyway, I’ve never much liked Savage, after seeing the way he treated some of our neighbors. But I told him roughly how much you guys made, and your monthly expenditures that I know of, and he seemed to be quite receptive to the idea of handling your mortgage.”

  Red asked, “What mortgage, if you already deeded the land to us?”

  “Well, silly, unless you’re going to live in the hay barn, you’re going to need a house. So instead of looking for an apartment, you can start shopping for a builder.

  “And Savage said that unless you have something terrible on your credit report, he’d give you an interest rate two points lower than the going rate.

  “Just in the interest of being neighborly, he said.”

  Red was shocked.

  “But Dad, John Savage is the biggest crook within ten counties. Everybody knows that.”

  “I know, sweetheart. But maybe he’s trying to mend his ways. In any event, you’re married to a soon-to-be lawyer now, so I’m sure Russell’s smart enough to make sure there’s no shenanigans in the mortgage agreement.”